i love you more

My wife and I just finished going through the i love you more book and DVD curriculum by Les and Leslie Parrott. The book is a revised edition of When Bad Things Happen to Good Marriages. The premise of the book and curriculum is that problems will come into your marriage, and instead of them coming between you and your spouse, they can actually help you to grow closer to one another.
Using real life examples of other couples, (sometimes) helpful exercises in the workbook which are meant to let you access the state of your marriage, and an easy to read teaching style, the Parrotts show that love is not all you need - but that effort needs to be put in, and that spouses can tackle problems head on and come out better after them.
My favorite chapter was the one on building spiritual intimacy. In both the DVD and the book, the Parrotts discuss that you can do all the other things right, but without finding a way to be develop your relationship to God together, you will never be as close as you could be. They briefly look at Gary Thomas' book, Sacred Pathways (which I have heard nothing but good about and really need to read), and help couples find their individual "spiritual language". They also acknowledge that most couples do not share that language (at least the primary one), and my wife and I found that to be true, but also that our secondary language was the same. The Parrotts encouraged participants to find a way where you could connect with God together.
My wife and I would read a chapter, complete the appropriate exercises and then watch the corresponding teaching segment on the DVD. The teaching segment was unlike many others in that it was set up like you were observing a small group going through the material. The Parrotts had five other couples filmed with them and they went through their teaching and interacted with the other couples. There was also time where the DVD paused for viewers to discuss amongst themselves the topics.
Both my wife and I found this material helpful and hopefully will be able to incorporate it into everyday life.

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