The Dirty Little Secret
Pornography is "The Dirty Little Secret". It is easier to access than ever & just as addictive as alcohol or drugs. I can almost guarantee you that someone you know has or does have a problem with porn. You just don't know about it. It's a secret. We are flooded with images of scantily clad women on TV, billboards, even when checking our hotmail. This is where we begin. This is what Craig Gross (the author of The Dirty Little Secret & one of the founders of xxxchurch.com) calls "porn training wheels".
It then moves on with you mom's or sister's Victoria's Secret catalog. You see, the thing about porn is, it's a progression. You eventually get desensitized to something & look for something a little more extreme, etc. The average age a boy starts looking at porn is 11. Increasingly the largest age demographic to become entrenched in porn is 65+. This is a widespread issue.
For me, it was when my friend Mike & I were at the mall when I was 13. We went into a bookstore & he said, "Hey check this out." It snowballed from there. I could not get those images out of my head. Once I could drive, I would go to bookstores & steal a magazine & look at it at home. One night, while I was at work, my parents found "my stash". It just made me more determined to hide it better. Then the internet came along. This just made it easier to look at & easier to hide.
I only recently told my wife about this & with her keeping me accountable as well as having accountability software installed on my computer (free from xxxchurch.com); hopefully we can close the book on my dirty little secret.
Enough about me. This book is a behind the scenes look at xxxchurch.com & the inner workings of the porn industry. It is eye-opening & insightful. In it are stories from people (men and women) who struggle with porn, stories of porn stars who have been helped out of the industry by the guys at xxxchurch.com & stories of the widespread epidemic that porn is.
I really think that every pastor, every youth pastor & every parent needs to be informed about this topic & this book is an excellent resource to get informed. Craig also hosts a podcast with the other founder of xxxchurch.com, Mike Foster, which is very good (quite funny, as well). The website also has links & helps for those seeking relief from this addiction & for those hurt by a loved ones addiction & for those merely attempting to be informed about the problem porn poses.
This is a topic that makes people uncomfortable to talk about. But in order to help people, the church, family, friends need to be willing to get uncomfortable & bring it out in the open. Only then can those engulfed in porn finally find relief.
I know this first hand. I talked with two different male friends about it (both of which also struggled with porn), but we never really followed through on consistent accountability. I can't tell you how many times I prayed that God with purify my heart & give me the strength to overcome this. But I didn't go the extra step I needed to & find accountability. Only with God's strength & a friend's (& wife's, in my case) accountability can we quit this pattern of behavior.
Great book. Not for the faint of heart, though - Mr. Gross doesn't hold back too much. But this book is well worth the time & money for the read. If you are a parent, please read this book, or at the very least visit their website. Please get informed about this problem & get in the faces of your children, as uncomfortable as that will be. They may not thank you, but their future spouse may.
You can pick this book up here for 20% off.
Download the x3 accountability software here. (free)
Subscribe to the Dirty Little Secrets podcast here. (also free)
-posted by cubfann